Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrgggggggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh............................

Capital F to the U to the C to the big K. I've been marooned again. This time in Wichita of all places. I'm just mad cause I'm bored as hell. I could seriously scream my pathetic lungs out right now in the terminal just to see what happens. Ey-yi-yi, life just sucks. I get outta work early after getting my ass handed to me for a couple of hours only to leave the main airport bar cause of this really creepy guy that I didn't want to have to deal with only to find the next bar closes early cause Wichita is so small and po-dunk that they close their airport early on Saturdays. I swear if it wasn't for the free internet connection then I'd go insane. I'm just tired and stressed and fucking lonely. I am excited to go to Denver for the night and be "that guy" that has a 12 hour layover and gets a room for the night and goes to the seedy strip bar by the airport :-D Actually, I am pretty tired so I may just get a jacuzzi suite and plenty of booze and chill for the night. I have to be back at the airport at 5am so I'm not going to the LoDo for the night. I need to get back to Indy cause I'm supposed to be in a go-kart pit crew tomorrow. I'm the "Jack Man". I get to lift the back of the kart so the "Lube Man" can lube the chain. I may burn my face off in a horrible twist of fate ;-)
Anwho, the work trip happened at 4:58pm on Thursday and I left Indy at like 6am Friday so life's been shitty in that manner. I'm just super stressed cause I'm no ARINC 429 expert and have been getting my ass handed to me by people that should know more about it than me. I don't mind too much cause I'm like the ARINC-Deity now. Yes, I may bitchslap you in ways you didn't know possible. But still stressed..........so very stressed...................oh and to top it off, my virginal brother is getting more ass than me and he likes to brag about it :-/ Naw, you know I'm not that petty. Hats off to those taking their tops off ;-) Like I said the other day, I'm just bored.........so very bored.......................

Very bad indeed...............superBad.................

I woke up to the book of revelations written on my arm in eyeliner and blue pen. Thank God they don't tattoo you if you're drunk. Thank God for Chick-fil-A. Well, that was an interesting night. To say the least. I ended up putting my O.A.R. concert dvd on the tele and jamming until the wee hours of the night. Although I should've just called in sick, I'm at work and do not want to be. Actually, when do I ever want to be...............................

just a hint...........

going to be a very.............very...................bad.............night......................c u in da moring............

me homer? you marge?

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA...................did i ever tell you about the time I beat Nuclear security????????????? policy is that if you smell/reek of alcohol, then "for cause" testing immediately with revoke of unescorted access. well, 1 day I walk into the main gate house and had just popped a Listerene breathe strip to avoid offensive breathe due to the smoke I had on the drive in................a very important supervisor stopped me and a union fuckbag b/c he had smelled "alcohol" between da both of us on the way in....................too funny.............Me, being the brains of the operation ;-) quickly whipped out my pack of breath strips to prove to the undergraduate class of 1979 that me and douchebag were not in fact drunk but victims of a poor ploy to catch Al-Quida (sp?) hahahahahahahaha (ie bin ladin).....(ie alladin)......;-)
anywho, fock me.........fock you.......fock everyone..........pass da bottle..................

shiraz.....shiraz.......sherry..........

hahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahhaahhahahah.........................perhaps I am drunk..............perhaps I am not.................."She's The Man" might quite possibly be the funniest movie this decade.................perhaps not...........hahahahahahahahahaha.........................Yes, I have decided that my mind is no longer my own. Up is down..........Left is right..............Wrong is Wrong.........but................[yellow tail] Shiraz is delicious........................... ;-)

I fought the law and the law won................

Yup, I've finally drank myself stupid. I'm heading home after a long day of work and got diverted by some cops cause of a prior accident on "dead man's curve" on my way home. I needed new shoes so I stopped by Kohl's to check out the scene. Nuffin for me so I go to head to Shoe Carnival for a real deal. Well, as I carefully exit the parking lot, a two-fer happened. One, some dipshit was taking his sweet ass time coming down the main isle and Two, I had a brain fart. I decided to get out in front of the slow moving truck. Well, unfortunately, my light-weight front-wheel drive car likes to squeal tires in such a situation. Usually, I enjoy sounding like a BAMF! but today I heard someone yell out "Hey", to which I ignored and kept on going. Well, the Marion County officer caught up to me at the next red stop light. Unfortunately, the brain fart was still pending and I have been extremely bored with life in general these days. As I pulled over and prepared to face the officer, I decided I'm not going down without a fight. I was going to stand up for all of us regular joes that get a bad name from assholes that fuck-up like its their job. So, as the officer starts yelling, I start defending my position and explaining the physics of a Toyota Corolla. I remain in an exasperated tone the whole time as the cop keeps heating up. Yeah, no pity party for me. He drops out the ultimate attitude adjuster, "You wanna go to jail?!?!?!?!". I'm not going to even lie, I almost said "yes" just to break the monotony of my day. Instead, I turned into bitch-mode and apologized for everything and agreed with everything the big bad man had to say. Eventually, he did explain that he just came from the accident at Dead Man's Corner where a lady tailgating another car lost control and ran over the lawnmower guy. So, I did understand the copper's position that he'd seen enough today but still, I was in the mood for some jail time. He took my License and Registration back to his car for like two seconds, calmed down and then came back and in a copper way, validated that maybe I wasn't driving recklessly and had made a poor decision in the parking lot that was not worth jail time. Then, he opened his heart to me and explained how tired he was of the traffic-time shift cause of all the accidents he had to deal with and he was switching to third shift. Still, I remained in bitch-mode and gave him all the empathy and sympathy I could without physically handing over my testicles. I took my sweet time getting to the 'Carnival to get new work shoes and then some White Castles for din-din. Eh, rock bottom has never felt so much like home.................................